an unmentionable something came into mind and it seemed easier to have a something rather than a nothing, or a nothing rather than a something because it made relationships seem easier. to have nothing or something. a binary transaction with emotions. and I so much want things to be easier. to be able to say "oh, i don't know. they just have a something" unexplainable but still reliable. people trust it. people will trust things you say more often when it comes to love.