are you awake?

I thought then that heaven wouldn’t be some abstract cloudy lounge in the sky,
it would be a grocery store where you don’t have to pay for anything.
Only the person who says “hello”
would be much more attractive,
and would be wearing a much more soothing color scheme.
-Joseph



Heaven


What a place.

Why would anyone
want to be
anywhere?

Here is a shoe.
Wear it.

You have walking to do.

Jean Paul Sartre chose non-monogomy

and so does Kendra Malone, and I think she does a good job getting her point across. She got me thinking enough to at least write this, to help connect what she means to what it means to me. Why I publish it, no idea. Publishing is something I should think more about, I guess.

"For me it is a mutually positive relationship. Unfortunately these are some of the first people to over simplify my occasional unhappiness with the situation. Like people in relationships often are, I from time to time am unsatisfied with the outcome of an affair in an emotional way."

This, I think, is one of the most important examples. In every choice there is always unhappiness, but we are more willing to point fingers when someone else is sad if they do not share our personal views, merely because we cannot understand theirs. This can also be said for people I know who participate in non-monogamy, or any other deviant life style. An honest thing to say would be to say "I don't understand it" and leave it at that, unless you have tried to understand it. Really tried. This would involve not pointing fingers, or hating/judging a person whose act you find to be disagreeable. I guess, you should be pointing fingers at the act, not the person, and the only way to do this is, perhaps, to merely live in a way you see fit, then also choosing this act for everyone. At least there is conviction.

"In choosing myself, I choose man."
-Sartre

no,

it cannot be
that I have never mastered

mastery.

how is it
you do not see my asking

you do not wonder why
you are holding hands

with complexity

Another reading

Sunday, February 22nd
Bar 169
169 East Broadway
6:30pm

featuring
myself, David Miller, CJ Hauser, Nick Henderson, Don Brown,
Leah Schnelbach, & others.

New habit: Staying up until 3am talking to Woody Allen movies.

book release & reading - tonight

Book Release/Poetry Reading/Slide Show
Tuesday, February 10th
8:30- ?? (Reading at approx: 8:45-9:00)
Think Coffee - Bowery Location
1 Bleecker St - take 6/B/D/F/V to Bleecker or Broadway/Lafyette stop

for Low Level Clouds - a little black book (made by me) with poems and art based off of the work of Diane Arbus

It being what it is

for my students

Simply put,
I have tried to mention
what it means to come from desk

to chair,

where we are hardly
an indication

of where it is we go


speech
is only evidence
effaced

white,
and then black

the dust of the room
on loan
waiting in the tense
of present.

things you could be doing right now

Reading my friend's blog. "A Long Way" is about Joseph. Understanding is an understatement.

Thinking about Maine. Joseph reflects on Maine in his blog. I had a dream about Maine once. I hope to go there this summer. I think Joseph is right about Maine.

Reading this Oppen poem.

Whatever else is fine.

short list of some things on my mind

please comment with things on your mind

- where is "on" the mind located?
-facial expressions, mirrors, lack of being able to see my own response in social situations and only being able to estimate based on responses from other facial expressions
-memory, time - the relation of the two
-what it means to lose something, someone - identity - how someone can seem dead because the person you knew that person as no longer relates to a person in existence now
- how this is harder than i initially thought, and wonder if id get tired of writing down a note to myself every time i thought something
- mammals

i rarely ever question what will happen when i die